Monday, May 23, 2016

Do I really have to obey my husband?

As a wife, God has called me to be obedient to my husband. In this particular thing, I must admit that I have failed Him time and time again.

I have never liked that word, “obey.” I made sure the preacher did not use it in our wedding ceremony and I considered myself to be excluded from that command.

Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands…” 1 Peter 3:1

Yep, that one. That verse was written a long time ago. Women did not have jobs or rights back then. Surely God did not mean for that to apply to me.

“Actually, I did.”

I mean, I’m a strong, independent woman.


I have a job and am a provider for our family. Actually, I make MORE money than he does. Shouldn’t he defer to me instead?

“No, No, and No” 


“You’re just not getting this, are you?”

But God, my husband does not believe like I do.


Well, surely that excuses me, I mean he can’t possibly know what is right for me in your eyes.

“My command stands.”


“It stands, read the rest of the verse.” “That even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,”

But, God, he won’t even let me tithe out of my own money, so I have to disobey him, right?

“No. Obey him.”

But, God…

“I know you want to tithe, but it should not be a point of discord in your marriage.”

“When you place yourself under your husband’s authority, you are also under his umbrella of protection. If your husband is a believer, he is under My umbrella. If he is a non-believer, you are still under My umbrella of protection because you have followed my commands. If you remove yourself from his authority, you are also denying My authority over you.”

I felt led to write this post as a conversation between myself and God. I believe God spoke to my heart as I was writing. 

But I also know there is corruption in the world, and there are men who abuse their wives and children.

Personally, I cannot tell you what to do in that situation. My belief is that this alters the circumstance to a certain degree.

If you are in a situation of abuse, and seeking a way out, I suggest that you pour your heart out to God and listen for his guidance.

I’m not asking you to wait for an audible answer, but if you pray for God’s guidance and your phone rings on the “Amen,” it may be an answer to your prayer. It could be your sister, on her way with a truck to get you moved out, or it could be your husband, calling to apologize and tell you he wants to try counseling.

Just listen for God’s guidance. If you are in this situation now, I pray that God will give you peace about whatever answer He sends.

The opinions expressed here are my own, and are just that, opinions.

Feel free to share your own story or experience in the comments below.

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